Introduction

[Note: The entries in this diary appear last in first out, after this Introduction.]

This is my diary of my experiences with weight loss surgery. I use this general term, because there are two (actually more) types of weight loss operations: gastric bypass or lap-band. But, I am getting ahead of myself. Click to see more...

[Note: in the rest of this blog, you will see the "Click to see more..." message at the end of each posting. Many times,there is actually nothing more. So, at the end of those posts, I have proceeded the "more" link with "End of post, so don't ...".]

Friday, September 26, 2008 I had my first set of appointments in the preliminary examinations for Weight Loss Surgery. Here are the facts:

• Weight: 343lbs (350lbs with clothes on, but I will use 343 as it seems to be my body weight set point)
  
• Height: 5' 11"
• Body Mass Index: 47.8 (non-overweight BMI: 18.5-24.9)

(go to BMI Calculator to figure out yours)

The standard qualifications for WLS patients are a BMI > 40 and an age between 18 and 65. I qualify.

I had an electrocardiogram which was judged OK, but there was one little dip where there should have been a rise and so, since I am 61 I am scheduled for a stress test to make sure everything is OK.

The subject of the appointments I will have, ending with a meeting with my chosen surgeon, are:

• Two seminars on Weight Loss Surgery
  
• Blood work
• Introductory meeting with Bariatric nurse
• Introductory with director of WLS program at BIDMC
• Ultrasound to determine if I have gallstones
• Stress test
• Nutritionist
• Psychologist
  
• Exercise physiologist
  
• Surgeon

i.e., extensive.

On my application to the Bariatric Surgery Program at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, my answer to the final question of "Tell us about yourself..." was:

My primary reason for wanting to get control of my eating and consequently my weight is because I am fearful of all of the adverse health conditions that have accumulated in my body due to being significantly overweight in the last 15 years. Yes, there are many activities that I no longer can do because of my excessive weight. Things like walking, hiking, enjoying the adventurous aspects of traveling. Then there is the self-loathing that results from my lack of discipline to "just eat less" and my appearance.

I'm pretty smart and that has worked against me. Although I was very successful in loosing weight in Overeaters Anonymous, after a while I started to fail because I started to ignore the advice that "Thinking is not on of the tools of OA". And indeed it has taken me several years to fill out this form, because after I investigated everything there was to know about weight loss surgery, I thought "Why go through that? I can always exercise the discipline that you will need after the surgery and loose weight without going through the surgery." The only problem is that I never got around to exercising the discipline, and so the weight stay on. I have finally realized that all of this intellectualization has resulted in me weighing 350 pounds and on the verge of diabetes, the third or fourth medical condition due to my obesity. My biggest fear is how to deal with the stress I currently relieve by medicating myself with overeating. Then, of course, there are the unknowns about what it will feel like after the surgery, and the well publicized surgery complications.

Having said all of this, I want you to know I am both enthusiastic as well was watchful about what I am going to do. Please wish me luck.

Harry

P.S. Why did I choose the name "Reboot" for this blog? Well, in computers when the machine starts to perform badly because of the accrual of lots of junk, mismanaged memory, rogue processes, etc., the best thing is to reboot the machine and start from scratch. I find this a metaphor for what I am about to do regarding my eating: lots of bad habits, reasons for eating, out of control behaviors. The best thing is to start again with learning how to eat and WLS surgery is the only 100% foolproof way to do this. -- HF

A little discouraged

I know that it takes a while to get the size of the adjustable band opening correct, but currently, after one fill, I have very little sense of appetite suppression from the band. I know this will be corrected in the future, but still, I am growing impatient to experience the effects of the band as it was described to me.

Although intellectually I know this all to be true, emotionally, I am getting impatient and discouraged. I don't believe I have lost much weight since the end of February and find myself thinking more as a "dieter" than as someone who has had some help from the band in changing their eating behavior. By "dieter" I am referring to the emotional feeling that I am going to eat a certain way for a while so that I can loose weight, using a combination of an eating plan combined with will power to stay on the diet. And then ...

What I am trying to accomplish is to change the way I eat food with the assistance of the lapband to lessen my appetite. I realize (now) that there will always be a planning component, and a will power component, and an exercise component, but each of these will be aided by the lapband component. And, that is the part that isn't working for me at the moment.

The image of people with lapbands eating off desert sized plates with tiny portions using tiny spoons and being satisfied just isn't my current experience... End of post, so don't ...

Click to read more...

My 8 Week Checkup & First Fill

Diver: "Will you fill up the tank?"
Gas Station Attendant: "Sure, and would you like me to check under the hood?"

That's what the language sounds like, but the experience is a little bit more important to me.

On Thursday, I flew back to Boston from Florida for my 8 week checkup since the gastric band operation on Jan 5. It was all pretty simple -- much less drama than the title sounds.

The first part of the appointment was a meeting with 2 other patients with June Skoropowski, one of the two nutritionists on the team. This was mostly an information session where we went over a new information package about Stage 5 of the eating plan -- that one that I will be on for the rest of my life -- such a harsh phrase...

After that, I met with Ben Schneider, the surgeon who installed the band. He asked questions about how things were going, how I felt, what my hunger was, etc. Then we agreed that he should do the first fill (and I had to sign some papers saying that if my insurance company refused to pay for the fill, I would pay for it).

The fill itself was painless, and over before it started. He inserted a needle into the port that is anchored just below the surface of the skin in the middle of my stomach. All I felt was a slight pinch and then a short pause while he injected the 3cc of saline into the port. And then it was over and he was putting a bandaid over the injection area. Easy.

[Note: This is not my X-Ray, but one that I found on the Internet]

Three days after the fill, I am now understanding, for the first time, the impact of the band on my feeling of fullness.

It is one thing to feel full, it is another thing to anticipate fullness before you stop eating. A new thing for me. Recognizing fullness coming on is still something I need to learn. This is why there is emphasis on eating sloooowly -- to allow your stomach's messages of fullness to register with your brain.

I am much more encouraged about all of this than I was before because the band is actually doing what has been described to me for the last 5 months. For a while there, I was feeling just as hungry as I have always felt. I was beginning to wonder, but I had been reassured that this was common prior to the first fill. Now, I know the feeling of fullness after eating a reasonable amount of food.

I still need to resign from the clean plate club. Seeing food on the plate does not mean that I have to eat it.

I am sure this was said to me during the build up to the operation, but I need to remind myself always: The gastric band is a tool which when combined with diet and exercise, can results in weight loss. This needs to be my mantra that I keep reminding myself of until I feel that I am "with" the program. It isn't something that I come to naturally. But I want to learn...

Click to read more...